WE NEED TO START EARLY

The life of a young adult is a like a rollercoaster that last for years. With emotional ups and downs and ins and outs, a young person can feel on the verge of something – anything – long after puberty sets in. Early adulthood is a period marked by changes and growth physically, mentally, and emotionally. It is also during this time that the onset of mental health disorders can occur – illnesses that can severely impact the life of the individual for years to come.

First, it’s understood that young adults can be moody, cranky, and angst-ridden with or without the influence of a mental health disorder. That’s just part of growing up. Young adults generally love or hate things, and one bad day can make them feel like the world is toppling down. Because young people are prone to mood swings and often feel out of control, it may be hard to identify what is a mental health disorder and what are normal growing pains. But there are indicators that a young person’s bad mood may be a little bit more serious

It is estimated by ChildTrends.org that approximately one in five adolescents has a diagnosable mental health disorder. These disorders can range from depression, anxiety and autism spectrum disorder to personality and behavioral disorders. This is a time also when mental illnesses can be first recognized in a person. Typically, up to half of all substance abuse and mental health disorders have roots or can be identified before age 14. The number climbs to three-quarters by age 24.

Genetics and family situations do tend to have a role in adolescent mental health. Males tend to have behavioral and autism spectrum disorders as well as attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), while females are often prone to depression and eating disorders. People who were raised in families of abuse (sexual or physical), whose parents have lower levels of education, or whose parents also have mental health disorders tend to be predisposed to mental health conditions of their own.

The National Institute of Mental Health Disorders estimates that 3.7 percent of children ages 8 to 15 have depression in the United States. It is the most prevalent of mental health disorders among those at this age, with at least 25 percent of high school students exhibiting some mild symptoms. The British Medical Journal cited that approximately 8 to 10 percent have severe depressive symptoms. As with depression in adults, adolescent depression is often marked by the same overwhelming sadness, anger and melancholy. Unlike adults, however, teenage depression may include more irritability than sadness, as well as hostility. Teenagers experiencing depression may also be hypersensitive and complain of headaches or stomach-aches.  In addition to these signs and the above generalized symptoms, you may also want to look for:

• Feelings of worthlessness, loneliness or helplessness
• Problems concentrating
• Extreme fatigue or disinterest
• Frequent crying
• Thoughts of suicide or preoccupation with death

If we cant sort this out now then the stigma continues because its learnt behaviour. Explain to young people of today its fine to talk. Why is mental illness the unspoken illness. 

Act now and talk.

THE MINDSET TRIANGLE.

Who remembers their lovely science class at school on the fire triangle, for a fire to burn you need Heat, Fuel and Oxygen. Without one the fire will distinguish. I work with the same principle for a healthy mind set.

Might sound silly living your life to a triangle but it works for me and it’s so simple to follow and stick up around the house like on the beer fridge or the draw that holds all the take away menus. Just to give you that second thought to change your mind of your actions. I find it really useful to reflect on why I feel like I do, if one morning the 10 stone duvet has got hold of me and won’t let me up I always look at the 3 elements first. EXERCISE, SLEEP AND HEALTHY EATING / DRINKING. 9 out of 10 times I hit the nail on the head within a few seconds and know where to make the changes.

Exercise.

I'm not saying you need to sign up for the next marathon or become an Ironman overnight but exercise is the best medicine for depression. Choose to walk to the shop instead of drive, take the stairs at work instead of the lift, take your kids to the park with a ball. There are many ways to get that endorphins release. It’s not until I am feeling down and can’t be arsed to go to the gym I notice my mood change, not straight away but if I am lethargic for a couple of days the first step is the hardest as it is with most things but once you do the rest of the steps will follow and you will feel better and motivated. 

Sleep

This is the hardest one out of the 3 as with the other 2 you can control. How is it, that you are tired sitting on the sofa so you go upstairs get into bed and you are wide awake for bloody ages. It’s not until your alarm clock goes off that you realise how tired you are and how heavy that duvet is. How can you help with this? Stop looking at anything digital I-pads, phones, T.V's, laptops the lot at least 30 mins before you want or need to be asleep. It triggers brain activity and you will want to chill out and relax. I have never been a reader but I find this to chill me out and get me in the mood for sleeping. I think routine is a good one as well, yeah have a lie in at the weekend but in the week try and set the alarm to go off at the same time and go upstairs at the same time.

Healthy Eating and Drinking

My favourite subject but also the one that has the most temptation. Looking back over the years I’ve had depression but wasn't aware at the time I used to drink a fair bit, I wouldn't say I had a problem but if I was stressed or had a bad day the offie would be the port of call on the way home. I also have the no pint or 10 pint characteristic to my personality. I'm not so bad now I’m older but in the past if I had 10 in the fridge I would off stayed up until they were drank. The trouble is with depression and alcohol is that alcohol is a depressant so with drinking a lot whilst being depressed just causes a firework display in the noggin. During the drinking part though it makes you happy and that you can take on the world or it does for me, I'm not saying don’t drink but you need to do it in moderation and know your limits or trust someone enough to tell you your limit.

Next subject is about what I love........ FOOD, Cooking, eating and everything about it. I understand not everyone has the same passion but it doesn't compute in my brain when someone says they can’t cook,  or I haven't got time to prepare a meal or the best one I don't like healthy food. Same as the alcohol everything in moderation. No need for you to go on an "I only eat dust" diet, it’s just healthy living. A bit of planning and room in the freezer there’s no reason why not, it makes you feel better in yourself and goes side by side with the other 2 elements. Who knows you may even lose a couple of inches or pounds to top it off. 




Over the next few blogs I shall be sharing with you some videos of cooking healthily and working alongside The Mind Set Triangle.​

What is the deal with Stigma???

STIGMA
noun (plural stigmas or especially in sense 2 stigmata /-mətə, -ˈmɑːtə/) 
Mark of disgrace associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person: the stigma of mental disorder or debt etc.


Just a few facts for you to have a look over before I jump onto my bandwagon.

• Stigma can cause mental illness and emotional trauma and often will lead to suicidal thoughts. 6,000 people commit suicide every year and the figure is rising. Currently, that's one person every two hours, every day.
• 1 in 4 people suffer Mental illness in the UK. Depression is more common than the common cold. 
• A greater number of British troops have been lost to suicide than have been lost in battle. Suicide often occurs because no practical help is available and no other viable option can be envisaged.
•  Women are more likely to be treated for mental health problems although British men are three times as likely to die by suicide than British women.
• Only 1 in 10 prisoners has no mental disorder.

Which fact baffles you the most?

There are many more stats about mental illness which are just as surprising. So why cant we talk about it to our peers? Is it because you cant see it? Or is it because you have a big house, big car, good job how can you have a reason to be depressed.

The chances are there is someone in you circle of friends or family that is suffering from mental illness. The one thing for them is to talk about it but find it hard because of the stigma or male pride. 

I still get dark days and most of the time haven't got a clue why and its nice to just say to a mate or wife or anybody really I'm having a shit one. I'm not asking for sympathy because the pat on back or cuddle will prob not help as will still feel shit after but knowing them there helps and just a random chat about sport or something completely off topic.

We need to kick this stigma into touch and talk about it. Too many people are dieing from suicide because they feel alone or helpless and a lot of it is due to society and why it is frowned upon because your "not wired up right." 

Lets get amongst it and talk about it. Im taking part in a 10 mile walk around the streets of London on the 14th May for a charity called Clasp. Get yourself down there and spread the word its good to talk.

Small mans syndrome

I could never tell you when and at what point the depression started or the anxiety and to be honest when I felt the feeling of anxiety I just put it down to a dodgy turn like standing up too fast. The point when I really felt different was when I stopped playing rugby. I had played rugby from the age of 6 when my Grandad took me down to the local rugby team to man me up. Every Sunday morning in the lovely British winter was spent running round a muddy field chasing an egg shaped ball.
     As I got older my Grandads love for the sport had been past on and I became an alright player but I had developed small mans syndrome. This means if I was a dog I would be a Jack Russell. A little angry thing that was in the middle of any trouble on the pitch and the man that most forward hated. All my aggression and frustration that had developed in that week at school or at home was taken out in that 80 mins on a pitch. That's the great thing about rugby. Both teams can literally kick the sh*t out of each other but then be best mates mates once the final whistle has been blown.

Once I was injured and couldn't play the game again I started to change. Only looking back at it now I can see the change but I am told by my close friends and now my wife I did quite a lot. I was jumping from job to job blaming everybody else for the reason of leaving. 1 of my elements from the fire triangle I explained in the previous
post had been taken away and my fire was being extinguished. I couldn't face work, that duvet had become 10 stone and I couldn't talk to anybody because nobody understood. Or that's what I thought. If it wasn't for the love of the friends and family around me then the next step would not of been possible.

After doctors appointments and then a random conversation with 2 friends in the gym I was doing therapy and training for a challenge, The Arch 2 Arc. The longest and hardest triathlon in the world. Not only were we going to attempt to complete it but we were attempting to break the world record.

The fire inside had just been re stoked, Stu Baker was back in the game.

I'm not trying to tell you to book yourself in for the next world record attempt just to look at the bigger picture and the things that make you tic to make up that fire triangle. Have a routine or a plan that makes you happy. Exercise is the best medication for depression and anxiety and not used enough in todays society but that's another blog.

Look back and be honest with yourself, stop blaming other people for the way you feel. They might have something to do with it but they cant put it right only you can. Talk to people and find that person you can vent too so you can close those doors behind you and take the next pathway to a happier future.

Take care guys

The Fire Triangle

I have had an amazing 4 week break over the summer starting with an all inclusive week away in Portugal with my amazing wife and yes all inclusive, to us Brits means eat and drink as much as you can in the time you are awake to get your monies worth. It was a wonderful week to completely chill out from life stresses and enjoy the time in the sun chatting to the wife about random stuff, really it was mainly about cycling ;-) . After we got back from the holiday it was a quick turnaround and I was off to spend some quality time with my number 1. Which included beach hopping, adrenaline quarry, Flambards, seal sanctuary lots of pasty eating and then meeting up with old navy shipmates I haven't seen in years which obviously resulted in a wood burner and plenty of beer. I had a great time with the number 1 and it was good to talk for a few days filled with plenty of giggling. Good job she has my sense of humour!! Yet again as soon as I returned form Cornwall it was down to Somerset to spend time with the younger 2. Swimming, Crab fishing which ended up catching an eel which to a man who is scared of snakes freaked me right out which followed with plenty of park action. The evenings again ended up much the same as Cornwall catching up with shipmates drinking & talking to early hours and then sleeping on the sofa.


The trouble is during those 4 weeks there were many days that I forgot to take my tablets which isn't a problem every now and again but a couple of days missing mixed with lager consumption is not a good mix. I had an amazing 4 weeks off spending time with people I love but there were a few dark days amongst that and was very hard top pull myself together put a smile on my face and get my jazzy hands out. Essentially its all my own fault and drink is probably the worst thing for someone who experiences depression and anxiety. At the time you feel great and I can deal with the hang over the next day but its the grey matter upstairs playing tricks on you.

Can you remember the fire triangle they taught you at school with oxygen, fuel and heat being the sections of that triangle. If you take one of them away the fire dies. I tend to work exactly like that said triangle but replace oxygen, fuel and heat  with Sleep, healthy eating / drinking and exercise. Take any of those away or mess about with one the flame tends to run a bit weak. So its all about balance and everything in moderation.

All good now and looking forward to getting my teeth stuck into work moulding and shaping the future of young people. Back on the bike, less drinking and a clean diet will be good for the mindset and I have started volunteering for the charity Time to change. This charity is awesome. The whole idea is to kick the stigma of mental illness and the way to do that is to educate people.

Did you know that 1 in 4 people within their lifetime will experience some form of mental illness. that's a massive number if you think about. Also suicide is now the biggest killer for men aged between 20 - 49. This number needs to come down. Why should mental illness have the stigma attached to it. Why can we talk about cancer so freely and not depression. Why do people need to whisper when someone is acting a bit differently.

All it takes is to start talking about our experiences and share stories and let people know that its okay to talk about it. People that you may have heard of have spoken about their past. Stephen fry, Ruby Wax and Frank Bruno are just a few names that back this charity and have experienced some form of mental illness. Take a look at the website and maybe make a pledge yourself.

www.time-to-change.org.uk





Take care guys and catch up with you soon.

THE DARK SIDE

Where is the dark side? you may ask. It's the place you go to when depression gets you by the short and curlies. There's nowhere like it. It has a gravitational pull where the duvet on your bed weighs about 20 stone and you just have no motivation to do anything apart from beating yourself up and finding every negative thought you have in the grey matter upstairs.

Whenever I have been there I can never put my finger on why I have the thoughts. I look back at what I was like a few years, back before diagnosis and to be honest it's amazing that I have come out of the other side. Self harm and suicidal thoughts were a constant battle and happened quite regularly and I couldn't understand why. Always on the search for someone or something to blame but could never find the answer.

I am completely different now and that has all came down to acceptance that " I'm not wired up right" and that taking the tablets isn't such a big deal. Believe me though when I first got the tablets I hated taking them and didn't think they did anything - until I'd forget to take them for a couple of days and really notice my mood change. In laymen's terms my brain doesn't make enough of the right chemical and the tablets replace this. Simples. Don't get me wrong I didn't get a prescription for the drugs straight away I was completely against it. I first went on a psychodynamic therapy course of 12 weeks at the doctors, which worked great to put a lot of things to bed from the past when I was a kid.

What I am trying to say is you have to make the first step. I'm lucky to have an amazing wife that could see that I wasn't happy even though when asked the generic answer is " I'm Fine". Don't be scared to get help or ask for advice. I punished myself for years. All jazzyhands and smiley stu outside and then a mess when in my own company.

Dig deep, kick that duvet off the bed stick on some trainers and walk round the block. Set a positive goal for something in the future that is achievable.

BREAK THE CYCLE OF THE DARK SIDE

MALE PRIDE

I must have started and deleted this blog about 20 times now trying to put what I feel into words so I am just gonna do what I do best and say it as it is.

I have suffered with depression and anxiety for many years now. I'm not sure when it started, maybe I have always had it but it has been masked by other factors.  One thing for sure - It got worse as I have got older, when stress levels are raised by having more responsibilities. You may be asking what's the point in me shouting out? It's because for years I have been hiding behind bravado because of the stigma that is Mental Illness. The MALE PRIDE trying not to show weakness as a man, be the man of the house that is expected of a father or husband. I want to let other people know that it is okay to be depressed and to talk about it to lighten the load.  It's not just a matter of cheering up. The phrase  "You just need to cheer up" still rings around my head after it took weeks for the wife to convince me I needed to see a doctor and for me to sit there and dig deep pushing the male pride aside and relay the feelings I have had, still have and the dark moments; for him to take a deep breath look me in the eyes and say " you just need to cheer up " hit me like a bull hits a red flag. 

Its been a fair few years since that doctor and now I can feel the feelings and counteract them with positive stuff. Exercise and pushing my mind and body in different challenges is my way. There are 2 reasons for this.  1 being that the body releases the natural chemical endorphins when you exercise which gives you a buzz of importance and happiness.   The 2nd would be the commitment of a challenge and raising money for a charity keeps me focused and if you can get a world record like we did in 2011 even better.

When I have a low day the best way for me to destress is to get on my bike. Only a cyclist knows how a dog feels with its head out of a moving car. The wind in your face, endorphins rushing around your body creating positive thoughts, the wonderful view of the countryside on a summers morning and the coffee and lump of cake you will inhale half way through your cycle is a great feeling.

From the forthcoming blogs if I could make somebody feel that they can have a chat to their friends or pull themselves away from the 10 stone duvet that gets heavier and heavier as the days all roll into one, go for a walk around the block and do something active I will be a happy man. Next year is no different from the previous as we have a challenge set. We will be aiming to cycle from John O'Groats to Lands End in 4 days. That will be an average of 220 miles a day...so a lot time will be spent on the bike from now until Easter. This time round we will be raising money for the charity Mind and trying to promote Time to Change, who Mind also support to try and get rid of this stigma.

We need to get the stigma of mental health well and truly kicked into touch.